"Cross My Mind" (A Short Love Story)

[Sweet Meat aka CC]

[glow=red,1,200]Cross My Mind[/glow]

[glow=blue,1,200]Thanky for all of your help, Peaches.[/glow] ;D

Cross My Mind
by Jill Scott

I was just thinking about you
Wondering if you wear the same cologne
Smelled good on you
Had the next boyfriend of mine
Try that same kind
But it stunk on him though
You know what they say
Everything ain’t for everybody
But I tried anyway
You sure did smell good
Hey
You’re just running cross my mind (repeat 3X)
You had that masculine thing down
Shoulders and back straight
Never slumping
Never round
It would turn me on
Just to see you walk into a room
Across the room
Out of the room
You really impressed me
Hey
You’re just running cross my mind (repeat 3X)
I know if I pick up this phone
Write this letter
Send this two-way
I know I’ma say some things
I know you’re gon’ say some things
That we both don’t need to say
Like um
How amazing
How amazing
When you would spread my limbs cross continents
Bump our bed
Way over that mountain’s edge
Kiss this and this and this and this and this and this and this and this and this and that
Show each other where the climax is at
You’re just running across my mind
Mmm across my mind
You’re just running across my mind
Mmm you’re just running
Hey
I was just thinking about you
And wondering what cha doing
I mean what cha been up to
I know it’s why I’m
Feeling so strong
Let me take a second minute hour
Think this thang through
I was just thinking about you
And wondering what cha doing
I mean what cha been up to
I know it’s why I’m
Feeling so strong
Let me take a second minute hour
Think this thang through
Remember all the moments for two
Remember when we use to oooh yeah…
But the reality
Honestly
You were never good for me
And I was never good for you
I just remember what we used to do

[Sweet Meat aka CC]

As my cousin, Raziya and I were walking through the mall to catch up on some shopping, I thought I saw a guy that looked like an on-again, off-again love of mine from two years ago.

"Johari? Didn't you say you needed a new charger for your phone?", Raziya asked just as we were passing Radio Shack.

"Huh?", I asked back as I quickly glanced over at her.

"Didn't you say you needed a new charger for your phone?"

"Oh...oh yeah. Thanks for reminding me.", I nervously smiled.

"You okay?"

"Who me? Yeah, girl. I'm fine. C'mon and lemme check out what they have."

"O...kay."

I don't know why I've been thinking about Usher lately. It's not like he gave a damn about me; well except for when it came to one thing. Other than that, I wasn't good enough for him to make a commitment to me which in turn made him no good for me.

Over the next several minutes while I browsed down the cell phone accessories aisle, Raziya was on the other side of the store checking out some CD players.

"Johari?", a male voice asked from behind me. I immediately froze in place before slowly turning around. I couldn't believe what I was seeing.

"Usher?", I broadly smiled.

"Yeah. I thought that was you I saw a lil' while ago. How ya been?", he grinned as he reached out to give me a big hug. I couldn't resist hugging him back as I took in a deep breath of the cologne that he still wore that I could never get enough of.

Slowly stepping back from each other, I noticed how he never let go of my hands as we stared at each other.

"I've been doin' good.", I replied with a bashful smile this time around.

"And lookin' good too.", he winked with a sly chuckle.

"Thanks. And so are you."

"Well, I try."

"So what are you doin' here? I thought you said you were never comin' back down south?", I asked while trying not to notice how much sexier he has become since the last time I had seen him.

"You still rememba me sayin' that, huh?", he grinned before going on to answer my question. "I was recently offered the position of Vice President of A&R at LaFace Records so here I am. I start at the beginnin' of next month, but I decided to come on back home to find a new place to live."

"Oh, that's good. So have you found your place yet?"

"Yeah. I found a condo that I'm gonna rent for a while until I can find a house to buy.", he smiled.

"Hey, Jojo. Did you find...? Oh, hey.", Raziya stated when she walked up on me and Usher in the middle of the conversation we were having.

"'Sup, Ziya? How ya been?", he smiled as he looked over at her.

"Aight. Ummm...I'ma be sittin' out here waitin' on ya.", she stated while looking from Usher to me and then back to Usher again. Once she was gone, he cleared his throat and took one of my hands into one of his again.

"So, is there a lucky guy in the picture?"

Okay, why did he have to go there especially when I can't fight all of these old feelings that I thought I had gotten rid of that are now rushing back at me as I gazed into his eyes.

"No, and that's by choice. I've been concentratin' on my career.", I stated while keeping a calm, nonchalant look on my face.

"Ohhhh, okay. Well how about lettin' me treat you to dinner tomorrow night?"

Although I wanted to tell him “hell no“, that wasn't the case.

"Okay. About what time?", I found myself asking.

"Ummmm...is 7:00 good?"

"Uh, yeah. That's...that's fine.", I replied with a quick nod of my head.

"You still live at the same address?"

"Yeah, and I still have the same phone number too."

"Aight, coo'. Well, I'm not gonna hold you. But I can't wait to see you tomorrow night. Take care until then.", he smiled as he let go of my hand and ran his index finger ever so lightly down the side of my face which sent all kinds of chills as well as electricity shooting through every nerve of my body.

"Okay. You too.", I almost whispered before watching him walk away. When I was sure that he was out of the store, I quickly placed my hand up to my chest to catch my breath back. I can't believe he still has this same type of effect on me!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Sweet Meat aka CC]

On the next night when Usher showed up at my place, I was a nervous wreck but I had no idea why. It's a good thing that Raziya agreed to come over to keep me company until his arrival. She even took it upon herself to open the door for him so that I could gather myself together in my bedroom.

"Oh hey, Ziya. How ya doin'?", he smiled when she let him inside.

"I'm aight. And you?"

"Pretty good."

"That's nice."

"Ummm...is Johari ready?", he asked when he noticed the slight attitude Raziya was throwing his way.

"Yeah, almost. Hey, Jojo! Usher's here!"

"Okay! I'm comin' out now!", I announced as I quickly glanced in my full-length mirror on the back of my bedroom door one last time. Not to brag or anything, but damn if I'm not looking good in my black knee-length strapless dress with a pair of matching black pumps along with a single gold chain I’m wearing with my two pair of diamond stud earrings in my ear that were bling-blinging thanks to my hair being pulled up high on my head in a ponytail of loose curls.

"Have a seat.", Raziya forced herself to faintly smile when she noticed Usher standing in the middle of my living room.

"Oh, I'm coo'. Thanks though.", he smiled back as he watched her sit back down on the sofa.

"So I hear you have a new job back here at home. Congratulations."

"Thanks."

"You're welcome."

Usher loudly cleared his throat while glancing around my living room. Since the last time we had seen each other, I had redecorated it. "I like what Johari's done with her place.", he quietly stated with a slow nod of his head.

"Yeah. Change is always good when you get tired of a routine thing.", Raziya retorted while watching him.

Being caught off guard, he quickly glanced over at her. However, before saying anything, I made my entrance into the living room.

"Hi.", I smiled although my eyes stared at Usher in total surprise. This nigga was looking so damn sexy dressed in a pair of jeans, a white button-down shirt, and black blazer with a black pair of Lugz that I found myself asking Raziya to come back with me to my bedroom for a minute after I lied and told her that I forgot to bring her silk scarf out to give back to her.

"We'll be right back.", she told him as she followed me down the hall.

"Ziya! I can't go out with him!", I anxiously whispered after she joined me in my room.

"Why?", she asked with a shrug of her shoulders.

"Because...well, didn't you see how fine he's lookin'?!"

"Yeah. So?"

"Don't'chu get it?!"

Raziya's response to my question was a blank stare.

"Look. I know I said that I agreed to go out with him on an innocent date, but with the way he's lookin' and if he flirts with me like he did on yesterday, then there's no tellin' about what may happen between us again.", I sighed.

"Johari. You're bigga than this so why are you stressin'? You, yourself said that if you ever saw him again, you wouldn't go there no matta what. So juss stick to your guns. And if he even TRIES anything, juss let him have it where it hurts the most."

For several seconds, I blankly stared at her while she smirked before the two of us began to chuckle.

"Okay. You're right. Thanks, girl.", I grinned as she and I shared a quick hug.

"Anytime. Now c'mon and go out with your FRIEND.", she stated.

Afterwards, I quickly snatched up my scarf that I lied about and gave it to her before we made our way back down to the living room.

"Okay. I'm ready if you are.", I smiled while looking at Usher who decided to take a seat in an armchair to watch tv while waiting on me.

"Yeah, I'm ready."

"Well, I guess I'll see you two lata. Have a nice time.", Raziya smiled as she gave us both a goodbye wave before letting herself out ahead of us.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Sweet Meat aka CC]

I was having a nice time with Usher during our dinner. However, during one point, I noticed how he began to lightly chuckle while in the middle of eating his soup.

"What's so funny?", I smiled.

"I was juss thinkin' back to the time we took that lil' weekend vacation down to Miami when my clumsy ass wasted clam chowder all over myself.", he chuckled once more with a shake of his head.

"Oh yeah. I remember that.", I laughed as I glanced across the table at him.

"Yeah, I'm sure you do since you were clownin' a brotha hard when it happened.", he smirked as he caught and held my eyes with his. "But I also remember more than juss what happened that night at dinner."

I loudly cleared my throat as I quickly lowered my eyes back down to my plate of food that I began to push around with my fork.

"I'm sorry. I hope I'm not makin' you uncomfortable.", he quietly stated as he ate some more of his soup while continuing to look at me.

"No...I'm fine.", I lied as I lifted my eyes back up to look at him.

"Coo'. So tell me more about your new business."

"Well, like I said before, I've only had it a lil' over half-a-year, but it's goin' pretty good.", I proudly smiled while reflecting on my new business venture as the sole owner of my own temporary employment agency centering around medical job assignments.

For the next few minutes, as I went on to explain what my job involved, we were interrupted when his phone began to vibrate. He explained me to on our way here that he was expecting an important phone call involving his new and upcoming job. He quickly excused himself from the table before taking his call as he stood up and walked across the restaurant to go out into the lobby to talk.

Several minutes later when he returned, I found myself being turned on from the way he confidently strolled back over to our table. His walk was another one of the many things that made me attracted to him. But that wasn't all...the minute he was sitting back down in front of me, he didn't mention anything about his call, but instead I was impressed when he remembered where I had left off in telling him about my new career. With so many great qualities that he had to offer, why wasn't one of them giving me his heart like I had foolishly done when I gave mine to him before he up and left me last time?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
After dinner, Usher dropped me back off at home. However, I saw no harm in inviting him in for a while since we were having such a great time catching each other up on what had been going on in our lives. Things soon changed though because the next thing I knew, a loud silence fell over the living room as we sat on the sofa next to each other.

"I always like it when you wear your hair like that.", he whispered as he moved closer to me while placing his arm around my shoulder. Then he did it...he leaned forward and ever so lightly placed his lips on mine. God knows I didn't want to do it, but I found myself kissing him back. When he pulled his face away from mine, he was wearing a small smile. After smiling back at him, we both began to kiss each other again while he slowly pushed me down onto the sofa as he climbed on top of me while gently running his hands up and down both sides of my body. When he began to plant open-mouthed kisses on either side of my neck, I thought I was gonna lose it! But I quickly came to my senses when I felt one of his hands going up under my dress. I quickly grabbed his wrist to stop him without saying anything.

"Johari? Is everything okay?", he asked while looking down at me.

"No.", I quietly sighed as I pushed him up from me. It was then that he realized that the reason why I was stopping was because I was holding on to what happened when he left me the last time.

"I'm sorry, sweetie.", he sighed back as he cupped my chin with his hand in order to turn my face to look at him. Once we were facing each other, he leaned forward and planted a light kiss on my forehead before deciding to leave.

Although I was proud of myself for not giving in to him after I closed the door behind him when he left, I let my silent tears freely flow as I headed to the back to get ready for bed.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Upon his arrival back at his place, Usher laid down on his sofa and stared up at the ceiling while thinking back to the night that he and I ended up on the outs...

"So you were just gonna up and leave without bein' decent enough to tell me anything?", I asked as tears welled up in my eyes while standing in the middle of his half-empty living room that was filled with boxes.

"I wanted to tell you, but I didn't know how.", he sighed.

"I can't believe that I actually thought you meant it when you said you loved me."

"I do and I always will. That's why I couldn't figure out a way to let'chu know that I was leavin'. But I was gonna call you when...", he started before I interrupted him.

"Juss shut up and save that stupid ass lie for the next woman that falls for your ass!!!", I cried as I backed up away from him to head for his door.

"Wait, Johari! I honestly didn't mean for things to end up this way!", he pleaded as he reached out to grab me. I quickly hit his hand away.

"I don't wanna hear it! I'm gone!", I huffed as I turned around and stormed out of his apartment.

..."Damn, J. If I get anotha chance, I'm never gonna do s.hit else to hurt'chu again.", he quietly mumbled to himself while continuing to stare up at the ceiling.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Sweet Meat aka CC]

"So how did things go last night?", Raziya asked me once she was sitting down across from me in the restaurant that we agreed to meet at for lunch on the next day.

"Well, I didn't give in under the pressure, but...Ziya, last night made me realize that I still have feelings for him.", I sighed.

"Whoa."

"I know right. I don't think I need to see him anymore."

"Well, do what'chu feel is right."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Damn, man! You got a lot on your mind don't'cha?", one of Usher's boys, David, asked as they worked out together in a gym in downtown Atlanta. He noticed that Usher was bench pressing non-stop.

"Yeah, somethin' like that.", Usher huffed as he did one more set of ten before sitting up to use his towel to wipe off his face and bare chest that was soaked with sweat.

"W'sup?"

"Nothin' except I took Johari out last night."

"Oh word? So she forgave you for that foul shit you pulled on her last time?", David chuckled until he saw Usher cut his eyes at him. "My bad."

"Anyway.", Usher smirked. "I thought things were coo' between us until one thing almost lead to anotha. That's when I realized that she hasn't forgotten about what happened between us last time. But the crazy thing is that I think I really do love her this time around. But my thing is how do I let her know that I’m gonna be serious with her this time around if given the chance when I played games with her so many times in the past?"

"The only thing I can tell you is to do whateva you feel is necessary to let her know just where you're comin' from.", David sighed.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Several nights later while I was lying across my bed relaxing by watching some tv after a soothing soak in the tub, my doorbell began to ring. Once I threw my robe on, I quickly went to the door to answer it while expecting it to be Raziya dropping in since it was only a lil' after 8:00. However, when I pulled the curtains back on my door to see who was on my porch, I saw that it was Usher. With hesitance, I wrapped my hand around the doorknob after unlocking it to let him in.

"Hey. I didn't catch you at a bad time did I?", he asked.

"No. C'mon in and have a seat.", I faintly smiled as I stepped to the side so he could come inside.

"Thanks."

"Ummm...so how have you been?"

"Pretty good. How about you?", he smiled as I sat down in an armchair next to the sofa where he was sitting.

"I've been good too. Just workin' hard as always.", I lightly chuckled.

"Nothin' wrong with that."

"Nope."

For a moment, there was an awkward silence between us until he cleared his throat to speak. "Ummm...I need to talk to you about somethin'."

"Yes?"

"Well first I wanna start off by apologizin' again for the otha night. That was wrong of me to put you in that situation especially after the things I've put you through in the past."

"It's okay. That's in the past and forgotten about.", I faintly replied while looking at him.

"No, it's not okay. Johari, it's crazy that until I ran into you the otha night, I didn't realize how much I love and care for you."

The moment I heard the word "love" come out of his mouth, I couldn't conceal the look of total surprise that came over my face followed by a small smile. "What?"

"I said that I didn't realize how much I love and care for you.", he repeated as he walked over to me and knelt down in front of me taking my hands into his. "I want to know if you'll give us one last try?"

Because I was afraid that he was trying to win me over once again in order to get what he wanted out of me, I found myself pulling my hands from his as I stood up to walk away from him.

"Usher, I just don't know.", I sighed as I turned my back to him after walking over to the other side of the room.

"You wanna know how much you really mean to me?", he asked as he walked up behind me.

I let out a deep sigh as I turned around to look at him, but was completely caught off guard when my eyes caught sight of a beautiful diamond ring sitting in an opened black velvet box in his hand. My eyes slowly looked from the ring to his eyes that were smiling.

"Are you...?", I asked even though I couldn't get my words to come out.

"Yeah. I want to know if you'll marry me because like I said, you mean that much to me.", he grinned as he knelt down on his knee in front of me.

This is what I had been dreaming of for the past two years after he and I met each other.

"Yes, I'll marry you.", I whispered as I looked down at him.

Without saying a word, he slipped the ring on my finger before slowly standing to his feet to share a warm hug and kiss with me. "I love you so much.", he happily sighed while continuing to hold me after our kiss was over.

"I love you too.", I smiled.

It felt good to know that from now on I'll never have to wonder about the true love of my life again because we've been blessed to be together from now on.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Sweet Meat aka CC]

A year-and-a-half later…

"Happy anniversary, you two.", my mother smiled at me and Usher as the rest of our family and friends stood around in my mother's living room to help us celebrate our one-year wedding anniversary by lifting their glasses to toast us.

"Thanks.", he and I both smiled at the same time before he took a sip of his champagne while I took a sip of my sparkling white grape juice that I asked for right before our toast since I found out on the week before that he and I are expecting a lil' one.

"Jojo? This is the good stuff. Why don't'chu wanna drink any of it?", he joked several seconds later while I finished the last of my drink.

"Because, that wouldn't be good for the baby.", I slyly smiled while cutting my eyes at him.

"Baby? Girl, what'chu talkin'...? Oh you mean...?!", he proudly grinned as he took a step back to look at me.

"Yup. In about six more months we're gonna be known as mommy and daddy.", I grinned back.

"Did I just hear what I think I heard?", his mother asked who was within earshot of our conversation.

"Yeah, ma. My baby's gonna have a baby!"

Well, that's all she wrote because his mother asked for everyone's attention to let them know our great news before I had the chance to announce it. But hey, as long as it was announced I didn't mind especially since I wouldn't have been able to talk anyway with Usher kissing me repeatedly while his mother spoke.

Once again, more congratulations were extended to us followed up by some more partying.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Later on after returning to our home, I took a shower and went to bed while Usher spoke with his mother on the phone for a few minutes before taking a shower as well. When he came to our room after he was done, I was half-asleep while lying on my back on my side of the bed.

Ever so quietly, he climbed on the bed next to me and gently laid his head on my stomach after giving it a light kiss. "W'sup, kid. This is your daddy speakin'.", he lightly chuckled. "I juss wanna let'cha know that with all I have in me, I'm gonna love, protect, and cherish both you and mommy."

"We love you too.", I mumbled as I gently placed my hand on his head to rub the top of it.

"I thought you were sleep.", he smirked as he lifted his head up to look at me.

"Well now I'm not.", I slyly grinned as I slowly opened my eyes to look at him.

"That's good because now I don't have to wake you up to ask.", he joked with a wink as he made his way up to me.

"Anyway.", I smiled before he and I shared a loving kiss.

--The End

[*~*Lady K*~*~]

awwwww that was so cute and sweet I don't know if I would have took him back like that, but hey it's a story. Good job girly!