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Post by JUCIEE GUDNESS FROM DA HOOD on Jun 25, 2004 22:11:33 GMT -5
I was at the Raz-Beats board today and a young lady made a post about body image and that Hollywood makes girls think that in order to be beautiful they have to be small in size.
I think that she is right and that the industry perefrebly the music industry is one of the main contributors to the deteriment of self-esteem. I mean look at all these videos with slim petite women, there is no love for the thicky-thick, and big women. I saw Elephant Man's video and yes he has a big girl in it, but they only show her for like 2 seconds, the same with Murphy Lee. I'm not saying that I want to see half-naked 200 pound women running around in videos, but what I would like to see is a tru represenation of the population. I mean they make it seem as if all females that are happy, got men, and cars, and fancy clothes are a size 3. NO, that's not true, or FAIR!!!!!!!
I have to give props to my Big sisters in the industry for keepin me sane andmaking me proud. Sisters like Angie Stone, Jill Scott, Queen Latifha, Kelly Price, Mo' Nique. It's because of them that I now realize it's okay to be a size 18 and still be beautiful. I just hope that some of these other girls realize that just like Christina Aguilera says " U ARE BEAUTIFUL, NO MATTER WHAT THEY SAY, WORDS CAN"T BRING YOU DOWN" don't let them bring you down today.
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Post by Sweet Meat aka CC on Jun 25, 2004 22:27:57 GMT -5
This is a wonderful topic of discussion! I agree with everything you said. I too am healthy-sized and proud! But there was a time when I felt bad about myself by not only what I saw on tv but by someone that claimed they loved me even though they were always critical about how I looked until I met up with a "special" friend that let me know there wasn't a thing wrong with me! Bit by bit, I started gainin' my self confidence back after meetin' this "special" friend and now close to four years later (even though I have lost close to 30 pounds), I always get compliments from men (some respectful and some not so respectful) who say they like what they see. So I'm reppin' the full-figured women to the fullest! Holla!
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Post by Tanee78 on Jul 1, 2004 17:22:56 GMT -5
I agree with you both! I'm not a size 3 and I don't think I'll ever be, unless I get on the crack diet and I dag on sure ain't going there! lol But I was reading this article from Feed Magazine and the title of it is Video Girl. I found this part of the article very interesting: The trend in urban music videos, by artists of both genders, is increasing amounts of females bearing skin while the fully clothed males admire. It has become such a convention that we barely notice the discrepancy. It has invaded television commercial parodies of the culture. Naomi Wolf's booke Beauty Myth discusses how this creates gender inequality. "Cross-culturally, unequal nakedness almost expresses power relations. In modern jails, male prisoners are stripped in front of clothed prison guards; in the antebellum South, young black male slaves were naked while serving the clothed white masters at their table. To live in a culture in which women are routinely naked where men are not is to learn inequality in little ways all day long." This inequality and the pressures to be beautiful affect all the women in our culture.You see...these women think they are really doing something when they shake their thangs in the videos, what they really are doing is making themselves weak in the eyes of these men. And they wonder why some men call them out their names. They also posted these lyrics from the Grits (a Christian Rap group) from their song called "Video Girl": "Misinformed adolesent/ She was teenage old/ Never told of her gold/ when she would roam fully clothed/ Just a jewel that got appraised by unqualified guys/ They lied- shallow/ Don't know her worth in God's eyes."Not to be too long winded, I also had to type these other lyrics I found in the same mag: You know the answers still no, it ain't happening /what you're imagining, dressed like Mary Magdalene /and smelling like jasmine, make a man wanna fast and repent /till the lust for ravishing you is past tense /you know cats that dig you for the size of your chest /are walking in obession with sex, and not blessing /what's more, is the "real you", they won't take interest in /your heart and soul is worth the gold without the flesh /in societies perception, what you expect /will always be reflected in how you dress, there's no exception / I won't diss your look, but I know some who'd rip your heart out /quicker than certain pictures in their nudie books /on your outer beauty girl I judge none, but know that /being a temptation is as bad as falling into one...[/i] To rap it up, a true man wants a respectable women, no matter what size. So if a man critizes you for your weight than he has a problem.
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Post by *~*Lady K*~*~ on Jul 4, 2004 15:24:42 GMT -5
Well said Tanee!
I am a petite woman, I've always been rather small every since I was born. Anyway, when I was younger, probably around 14, I would be jealous of the video girls cause I didn't have wide hips and big chest and behinds like they did. However, I had to teach myself what you look like on the outside shouldn't matter, and that I had to be happy with the way God created me. And today I live by those words that Tanee stated above whenever I hear a negative comment thrown my way. My mother is a big woman, and her confidence has rubbed off on me the right way. I hate to see men go around dogging females because of how big or how small they are. It's okay to have your picks and chooses on who u like, but my thing is don't disrespect the one's that aren't your preference. And these men that walk around here thinking every woman should wear a size 5 need to wake up, because if God wanted us all to be small, he would have made us small, but he didn't. He created all different shapes and sizes, and people need to expect this. I give 100% praise to women like Mo`nique, Jill, and all the others who are confident enough to say "hey no matter what you say about me, I'm still beautiful and still smilin." I know we will neva see the day when ALL men will realize that "beauty comes from within."
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Post by NinaSky on Jul 5, 2004 8:58:50 GMT -5
EXACLLY!!! I DON'T THINK IT'S FAIR THAT JUST BECAUSE US GURL AIN'T THE SIZE 0-7, THEY DON'T LIKE US. SEE NOW THATS WRONG MAN,I AM ALSO A SIZE 18 AND TRYING TO TEACH MYSELF TO LOVE MYSELF. IT'S HARD CUZ I SEE ALL MY FRIENDS HAVE A BOYFRIEND AND WEAR THESE NICE CLOTHES AND I CAN'T CUZ I'M A BIG GURL. THEY AIN'T NOTHING WRONG BEING BIG BUT IT MAKES YOU THINK DON'T IT. I THINK THOSE GUYS WHO JUDGE JUST WANT SEX AND I AIN'T A GURL WHO WANTS THAT JUST YET. I'M TOO YOUNG 1ST OF ALL AND IF THAT HOW A RELATIONSHIP STARTS THEN THE RELATIONSHIP AIN'T GONNA GO ANYWHERE IN MY EYES. I ASK'S MY COUSIN WHO ALWAYS GETS GURLS,I WAS LIKE "HOW COME I CAN'T GET A BOYFRIEND,IS IT BECAUSE I'M BIG"?.AND HE TOLD ME I JUST HAVE TO GO OUT AND DRESS UP BUT WHY CAN'T GUYS GET TO KNOW WHO YOU ARE? THEY JUST CARE ABOUT THOSE SKINNY GURLS. . BUT ONE DAY THEY GONNA SEE THAT SKINNY GURLS AIN'T PREFECT, SOME OF THEM ARE GOLD DIGGA AND SOME JUST WITH THEM FOR THE MONEY. SO I THINK THEY NEED TO GET IT TO THEIR HEAD AND IT'S WHAT ON THE INSIDE THAT COUNTS.
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